finding lori

My Momma.  She is our best friend.  My sis and I, and later, my daughter, did everything with her.  We were in church groups together, went shopping, out to eat, visited a few times a week.  My sis, and my brothers and I all live in a very small town, and our houses surrounded our parents house.  All our kids grew up literally running over to Amie and Poppas house for snacks, to play games with her or puzzles,  or to play in the yard where my Dad has built them a playhouse complete with electricity and a TV!   My Mom was the best grandmother to our kids.  Babysitting, hosting holidays, baking, ice-cream parties…you name it…they did it with their grandkids. We noticed changes in our Mom about 8 years ago.  She was 71. These changes became more changes and we became aware that she had a bit of dementia.  It wasn’t until my Dad went into the hospital that we realized how much it has progressed and how...

I have been doing a lot of thinking lately.    I have been struggling for a while now and I feel it is time for me to come to this space, that has in the past, been a safe place for me to jot down my thoughts, my feelings, my goals and just my day to day life fun, and finally get it all out.  Even if no one reads this, It really helps to get things out...it is therapeutic for me, and I felt it's worth a try sharing my struggles so hopefully I can overcome them and finally get on with my life. I am going to separate this into three different posts so it isn't overwhelming to read.   This first post is titled, My Dad because it all began with him.   My Dad was the head of our family.  He and my Mom were together since the 9th grade.  He was kind, quiet, loving and caring, and extremally  generous, and now he is gone.  He just had his 76th birthday on September 26th, and passed away on November 27, 2019.  He passed sudden...

My Dad passed away.  It is still unbelievable to say that.  My Dad passed away.  He left us on November 27.  Thanksgiving Eve. He was admitted to the local hospital on November 6th.  He was transferred to The Cleveland Clinic on November 23, after the local hospital was unable to figure out what was wrong, and passed away 4 days later.  He had been struggling with shortness of breath off and on since March, had every test imaginable, all coming back negative....and now he is gone.  My mother has dementia and now she is alone.  I got the phone call from the Cleveland Clinic that my Dad passed and I can still hear the Dr.'s voice.  He couldn't believe it as much as I couldn't.  I spoke with my Dad at 3:00 that day.  He passed at 4:55.  He sounded weak, but better than the day before when we drove to see him.  He wanted to transfer back home as soon as he was feeling better.  He never come home.  Two days before, he...