Welcome to my little place!
My blog was started to help me come to terms with turning 50, to find myself as I become an empty nester, and to help me with my weight loss journey. (Update Here)
I am in an amazing place in my life so now follow me as I move forward with the good and the bad, my continued wieght loss journey and just my life!!


Sunday, May 31, 2015

Randomness and Passions

Well, my first week of my Walking to Work Challenge is over.  I don't work on Fridays, but I did get a small walk in just I could keep my momentum up.

I work on Saturdays.  Sometimes I wish that I didn't, but we need to be accommodating for those customers that work during the week.  I actually don't mind it at all, unless there is something going on that I have to miss.  Our Saturday doggies are all regulars and we know exactly what to expect so it makes the day easy :)

My walk to and from work on Saturday was lovely.  I really didn't even mind doing it.  I actually looked forward to the walk home to decompress before dealing with home and Greg:) 


Here is poor Laker
watching Mia and I leave her behind :(



This is our new friend, from a neighbor's house, 
who watches us walk home every day :) 




I wanted to get a walk in today, but it has been raining all day here.  I have to admit, that I wouldn't have even had to make myself walk.  I really am beginning to enjoy it.  It's not as boring as I made it out to be:) 



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Last night my daughter Blayne spent the night with her two doggies.  I love having her here.  We both love movies.  We watched Disney's "Frozen", which she has seen many times, but I haven't.  I loved it of course.  We also watched "Cabin in the Woods", which we both have seen but it's been awhile.   I know, two totally different movies, but I am a horror movie freak and I'm not ashamed to admit it :)   

I have to share this picture of her two pups.  They are just adorable and even tho the "tinny black terror one" rules the house, my dogs love them....for the most part :) 


Meet Josie (ears down)
and Stella (ears up)
           




Last picture.....I promise :)

I wanted to share an updated picture of  My Sanctuary.  I added some curtains to it.  It really makes it feel so homey.  I feel like I'm in South Carolina on a plantation or something.  Greg loves it too.  Blayne saw this look on Pinterest and I just loved it!!




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Today at our church, our graduating senior's were acknowledged during Mass.  Afterwards, I stopped to talk to a friend whose youngest is graduating and leaving for the Air Force.  We talked about the empty nest feeling and how now we have to find ourselves.  I think that many of us have this feeling.  Whether you work outside the home, or are a stay at home mom, our lives revolve around our kids.  In my case, I was a stay at home mom until our youngest was 5, then we started our business.  I really think that I gave up my self in the process of being that mom who did it all.  I know many moms who do both.  Moms who are able to be wonderful, hands on moms, and still have a life.  I, unfortunately didn't do that.  I forgot that I was supposed to live too.  I never cultivated any close friendships because I didn't work outside of the home and I just never took the time to do it.  I never developed any hobbies, or did things just for myself.  That is my fault.  I am making that conscious effort to change that.  That's what "Finding Lori" is all about.  My weight, my mental and emotional growth, my social development, it's all a process that should have been a priority years ago, but for whatever reason, it was all put on the back burner.  I think the first thing that started my change, was when I started going out socially.  Girls night out with my family, coffee out with my sister, these little things have shown me that I am a women, not just a mom.  I never really used to do these things on a regular basis.  I can get dressed up, look good, have fun and it's OK.  I'm bringing Lori back.  

I think we all need to have a hobby.  To have that one thing, or more, that is ours.  We all need to find our passion.  Finally, I am finding a lot of things that I am passionate about.  Choir, blogging, my church meeting groups.  Even having lunch or coffee with a friend.  Anything that shows you that you are important.  That you are a women.  That you matter.  Anything that puts you first.  Joining the choir at my church was the first hobby type thing that I did.  I had wanted to join for awhile, but that meant sitting in the choir, and leaving Greg in the pew without me.  Besides, there was practice every Wednesday night, and that meant time away from the family.  I finally made the decision to put myself first, and joined.  There....Done.  I have loved every minute of it since.  We all need to make that decision.  Do it now,  Don't wait until you are almost 50, and your kids are grown and gone before you realize that you need to live.  Find your love, find your passion, find yourself!!

xoxo

"Finding your passion
 is about finding your authentic self.
The one you've buried beneath 
other people's needs."
~Kristin Hannah


Friday, May 29, 2015

A Helpful Share (WTW Day 2)

 It's late, but I wanted to get my pictures in before I went to bed.  Today's walk to work wasn't as bad as I thought.  It was really nice and sunny this morning.  I'm actually enjoying all of the beautiful sights that I look at daily but never really "see" them.  The peacefulness of my walks are enough for me to want to continue this :)


This first picture is the view of my road. 




Next is just some really pretty flowers
that I picked on my way home today!!



I do not work tomorrow, but am planning a short walk just to keep up my momentum.   

Blayne, my daughter, sent me this link to an article that I wanted to share. (Click Here)  I love looking at before and after photos of  those who have lost weight.  It really helps motivate me.  I also love reading their success stories.  I got a lot of good ideas from this article.  Once again, Exercise and eat right.  Simple right?   I'm slowly getting the "eat right" part down.....for the most part.  Exercise is harder for me.  I know it is important.  I get that.  I realize I will not get to where I want to be without moving more.  I just need to keep telling myself this so I can put it to action.   Hope you enjoy this article :)  
Thanks Blayne!!!!

xoxo

"Your body can do anything, 
it's your brain you have to convince,"

~Unknown


Wednesday, May 27, 2015

Day One....Walking To Work Challenge (WTW)

Hi Friends!!

Just a quick post about my day.  Today was day one walking to work.  Like I said, this is kind big for me.  I should be walking to work every day, but yet....I don't.  It is only 1/4 mile away from my house, so it doesn't even take me that long.  Sigh.....What's wrong with me :)

My first picture is Mia and I leaving for work. 
 I just stepped out the front door, getting  ready for that "long walk".
She's more excited that I am :)  




This next picture is from on our way home.  
It started sprinkling, so I cut through woods to get home.  
We passed my parents house
 and said Hello to my "sisters"  Molly and Maggie.


Oops....I didn't mean for both of my pictures to be of dogs....It just turned out that way :) 

I guess it wasn't to terrible walking.  Mia tends to trip me up a bit, and I have this weird fear of falling, so I took my time. :)  It did feel good to get out.  Maybe I will begin to like it??

xoxo


"The journey of 1,000 miles, 
begins with the first step."

~Lao Tzu



Tuesday, May 26, 2015

So, I Spoke To Soon

Hi very understanding friends :)

OK, so before you start giving me high fives for starting this new challenge, I need to make an amendment.  I tried.  Today I tried to get more steps in.  I walked to and from work.  That is only 1/2 mile total.  My job, luckily isn't a sit down job.  I am on my feet all day, unfortunately I stand in one place when I am grooming the dogs.  It is 5:45, I just got home from work, and I am only at 3,898 steps.  I have no energy to get over 4,000 steps in before I go to sleep tonight.  I probably could go to the gym, or go for a walk, but I need to make dinner, and I forgot how much walking hurts my knee.  I know, excuses, excuses.  But honestly......  Anyway, my amendment for my challenge is to walk to and from work every day this week and next week.  That in itself is a big deal for someone who dislikes walking, trust me.  So, instead of posting pictures of my fitbit, I will post some fun pictures of my walks, so you will know that I am not being lazy :)  I do feel like I've failed already, but I need to be happy with my challenge, or I wont do anything at all.  I was all ready yesterday to do this until I realized how much time was involved in getting those 8,000 steps in.  Lori=Baby!  I know, but I think this is a good compromise for me.
Thanks for understanding :)


I'll leave you with my best friend, my baby girls, my Mia..........



xoxo

"It's not always rainbows and butterflies, 
it's compromise that moves us along."

~Maroon Five


Monday, May 25, 2015

Afraid Of Moving

Happy Memorial Day.  Today is the day to stop and give thanks for those who have lost their lives for our freedom.  To remember why it is so important to support our troops in thought and in prayer, and to be grateful for those of us who still have our loved ones close to us.

My Memorial Day weekend is almost ended.  I hope everyone enjoyed it as much as I did.

I am back on a strict plan tomorrow.  Tracking, staying within my calories, and....I feel a challenge coming my way!! :)  I've decided to do a walking challenge.  I hate walking.  Well, I don't hate it, but I dislike it very much.  I am lazy.  No, I'm REALLY lazy.  I hate to move.  I like sitting after work.  I like lounging around watching TV.  I see people walking and running and wish I could be that way, but honestly I would rather sit and lift weights rather than walk.  I just don't have energy to do it.  But, I realize that this is not good for my health or my weight.  It's not doing me any good to be this way.   Everything you read and hear now a day is about how good walking is for you.  I think I'm the only one out there that isn't walking.  I used to walk....some.  I kinda liked it once I started, but once I stopped I couldn't push myself to try again.  So, because of all that, I am challenging myself to walk 8,000 steps every day for a week.  Now, I know what you're thinking.....they say 10,000 steps is what you should aim for.  Well let me tell you,  when I wear my fitbit, a little over 5,000 is the maximum I've ever done, and that is on a shopping day.  So, I've decided that I am not going to jump into anything I know I wont be able to accomplish.  8,000 is a big enough number for me to try to hit....trust me :)  UGGG....I am really going to hate this, but I think it is just what I need to push me to move more.   Get ready for some boring pictures of my pretty pink fitbit each day.  You know how much that helps me stay accountable even though it's tough on you all :)

So, I am ready.  I am determined.  I am confident.  I am scared......

xoxo


"Always do what you are afraid to do."

~Ralph Waldo Emerson



Saturday, May 23, 2015

Why Wait?

Hi Friends!  Happy Memorial Day Weekend!!  I have this whole weekend off and I am loving every minute of it!

It's been a few days since I've been here.  Things here have just been blah!  We had a death in our community.  A shocking passing of a beautiful young girl.  I didn't know her personally, but when you live in a small town like mine, you "know" everyone.  Her aunts are long time friends since elementary school and their loss is everyone's when the community is so close.  To add to the pain, my father was admitted to the hospital for possible heart problems.  He has had heart issues beginning in his 40s with a bypass 3 years ago, so every little thing, could be huge.  We waited for news for 2 days, and they finally sent him home last night after testing and evaluation, and had determined his heart was fine.  Spending all that time worrying about him, and praying for the family who lost their young girl, really puts life into perspective.  God gave us this body.  Not to harm it with neglect, food or anything else.  He gave it to us to live a life worth something.  We only have one life to live, and it can be taken away from us at any moment.  Without notice.   Since beginning my journey to find myself, I have been trying to live a more honest life.  Trying to be true to myself.  If you want to do something....do it.  If you need to say something.....say it.  Life is to short to hold onto hate, anger, and all the pettiness that comes with being a women.  Life is to short not to do things you've always wanted to do.  I got my first tattoo at age 49.  I've always wanted one, so why did I wait so long?  Fear of judgement?  Fear of the needle?  Why fear life when it is so precious?  I've always wanted to walk around the beach with just my bathing suit on....without a long bulky cover-up getting in the way.  So why don't I just do it?  Who cares what other people think.  As long as you are happy that is all that should matter.  Right?  Right!   We need to start living life how we want to.  Not how we think others would want us to live it. This year I've been better about this.  Dang it I should be doing what I want.  Wearing what I want.  Saying what I want.  I could be gone tomorrow and then I would have missed out on all the things I wanted to do but was just to afraid for whatever reason.  There is an wonderful saying that I saw one time.  It goes,  "Life is short, buy the damn shoes".  That's how I want to spend the next 50 years of my life. :)

xoxo

"When I'm an old woman, I shall wear purple.  
With a red hat which doesn't match, 
and doesn't suit me.  
I shall spend my pension on brandy
 and summer gloves and satin sandals, 
and say we have no money for butter. 
 I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired
 and gobble up samples in shops 
and press alarm bells 
and run my stick along the public railings. 
 I shall go out in my slippers in the rain 
and pick the flowers in other people's gardens.  
And learn to spit."

~Jenny Joseph 


Tuesday, May 19, 2015

Mexican Birthday Fun!!!

Last night the girls in the family, minus my two nieces, all went to El Canelo's Mexican Restaurant, for my sister in law Stephanie's birthday.  She is my youngest brother's wife.  I was 12 when he was born, so they are still just young pups :)  We had a wonderful time laughing, eating, and just celebrating Steph.  I had decided that morning that I was going to eat what I wanted, so I ate really sensible during the day, so I would have as many calories left for all that yummy Mexican food.  I know I went over, but at least it wasn't as bad as it could have been :) The main thing is that I don't let it ruin the rest of my week, and that I jump back on that same night.  I did that, so I'm in a good mood today :)  Don't ya hate when food can determine what mood you are in?  I do, but I still let it dictate my life like that.  It's a sickness :)


Here are some pictures from our dinner.........


Steph with the "Birthday Hat" and Fried Ice Cream that they gave her!!




Of course then we all had to get a picture with the hat :) 

My sister Connie




My Momma and daughter Blayne




Me with my sister in law Julie 




My sister and I just had to get this picture before we left


Hope we weren't too rowdy at the restaurant.  We tend to get a little crazy when we are all together :)  That's what family is all about!  Happy Birthday Steph!!

xoxo


"The more you praise and celebrate your life, 
the more there is in life to celebrate."

~Oprah Winfrey

  


Monday, May 18, 2015

Opening The Door Wider.......

Hi Friends!

So I did it.  I put a link on my Facebook page for my blog.  I wasn't sure I wanted to open myself up to those I know.  It's embarrassing.  It's not like people don't know I'm over weight....I can't hide that.  But the numbers, the failures, and the acknowledgment of it all is just stuff you usually hide.   Does that make sense?  Anyway, like I said, July is fast approaching, and I really need to step it up, so I thought posting my link on Facebook would help me.  I knew it would be hard.  I knew it would open the door for me to have to look at reality right in the face. And do you know what I found?  Love.  Kindness.  Understanding.  And best of all, Support.   There are a lot of us in the same situation that I am in.  Whether we are really overweight, or just a little.  Maybe not even, but just searching for our place in the world where we know who we are and where we belong.  Those of us who are in our second stage of our lives, whose children are grown and moved out, or just growing and don't need us anymore.  Who are we now?  I know I've turned to food when I'm feeling not needed.  That way I need myself, I mother myself.  I'm searching for my identity.  Searching for that women I am supposed to be.  I don't want it to be that unfit, unsure of herself, 50 something women.  I want to know who I am.  I want to be happy with whatever weight I am at.  I want to be a real person, who can eat in public with everyone else, and not let it ruin her day, the person who has opinions and is not afraid to share them.  To not be self conscious over every little thing.  I lost myself while raising my kids, and I'm just trying to find myself.   I'm getting there.  This journey is amazing.  It is a conscious effort to make changes for the better, to do things I've always wanted to do, even be a bit selfish, and to find out what's next.  This blog has helped me immensely and now that others, friends that I know have seen it, it will help me even more, and in turn, hopefully we can all help each other.  There is a whole new world out there, and I'm ready to find my place in it.  Who's coming?

xoxo

"The biggest change for me as a mom was realizing 
I needed to put someone else before me.  
Now the hardest part about the empty nest 
is learning to put myself first."

~Kim Alexis

Sunday, May 17, 2015

Women of Faith

Hi Friends!!  I hope everyone is enjoying their Sunday!

Today, our parish had our annual Women of Faith Breakfast.  This is just a way to honor all of the beautiful, faith-filled women in our lives.  My sister-in-law and 2 nieces were unable to be there, but the rest of us had a wonderful breakfast, listened to the children's choir, and just enjoyed each others company.  Here are a few lovely pictures to share with you.


My daughter, Blayne and My Momma. 
Oh no....she didn't smile!




My Sister Connie and I 





Sister-in-law Steph and niece Kierstin





My amazing family!


I am truly blessed!

xoxo

"A beautiful women uses her Lips for Truth,
 her Voice for Kindness, 
her Ears for Compassion, 
her Hands for Charity 
and her Heart for Love. 
For those who do not like her,
 she uses Prayer."

~Unknown

Friday, May 15, 2015

Food, July and Jewelry!!

Whew!  It's been one of those weeks.  I actually haven't been busy but sometimes that is worse for me.  When I'm busy and have a particular place to go, be or thing to do, I tend to be more organized with my time.  This week has just been a total time suck, by actually doing hardly anything.  Does that make sense?  I seldom do when I'm rambling, but that's OK :)

Anyway, I've been kicking it in the butt with my food this week.  I have continued to track every day, which came about from my challenge.  I forgot how in control I feel when I actually track.  Hopefully I can keep it up :)  My gym trips have been few and far between.  I can use every excuse in the book, but plain and simple, I'm lazy :)  Once I stopped going, it was so super easy to keep not going.  This morning, as I was lounging nice and comfy reading and drinking my coffee, I made a promise to myself that I am going back on Monday.  I realized that July is right around the corner, and that means my birthday.  One of my main goals before I turn 50 is to get fit, so I better quick messing around and get busy doing anything I can to make that happen!

 I just wanted to share some pictures from a jewelry party that my sister, sister-in-law and I hosted.


My Momma looking for the perfect piece to buy :) 



My youngest niece Kierstin looking at the demonstrator.  
She just loved looking at all the pretties! 




My sister Connie, on the left, and our friends,
 Angie, Lori, and Michelle :) 




My niece Ariel (standing) 
and daughter Blayne (sitting) 



 We had so much fun trying all the jewelry on! Jewelry, food, family and good friends.  What else could you ask for?

xoxo

"I have enough jewelry."

~Said No One Ever


Monday, May 11, 2015

Life Is A Wonderful Journey

Happy Mothers Day to all my friends who are moms, moms of fur babies, and to those of you who "mother" anyone, in any way!!  I hope you all had an amazing day!!

My Mothers Day was wonderful.  After Mass, we all got together at my parents house and we celebrated our beautiful mother.  I did get a picture of the girls to share, but some had already left, so everyone isn't present.

From the left, My Momma.....My daughter Blayne....Me
My sister Connie...My sister in law Steph with her youngest, Kierstin



I have a tradition on Mothers Day that I decorate my upper back porch.  We call it "The Sanctuary" because it is my relaxation place :)  I don't know why I always wait until Mothers Day to do this, but I do :)  Blayne usually helps me and she helps me decided what is to old and yucky and get rid of it, because I have a problem with keeping things way past their expiration date :)  Here are some pictures of my beautiful sanctuary, where we spend so much time during the summer.  Greg bought me a new swing and table set because our others were just not pretty anymore :)




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Just some pretty things to look at while I sit on my comfy swing :) 


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Mothers Day gift from Blayne


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Mothers Day gift from my Momma


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Friends and my fountain


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My side of the swing :) 


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Mothers Day gift from my sister :) 


I love this saying.  I  truly am in love with my life right now!!  Blayne hung it up for me right next to my swing so I can look at it and remember how blessed I am to have such a wonderful sister and a wonderful life.  I am at a place in my life where I am so happy with who I am becoming.  Finding Lori is an awesome journey and it is opening my eyes to everything our amazing God has giving me and everything he has in store for me!!  Life is so good :) 

OK, so today marks the final day of my Two Week Tracking Challenge.  Mentally, going over these past two weeks,  I am happy with myself.  I slipped up a few times, going super overboard at times, but overall, I am happy.  Tracking every day has shown me just what my trigger foods are.  It has shown me that I have more energy and am in a better mood when I don't over eat.  It has shown me how important breakfast is, and that it is so important stay away from diet sodas, and to drink more water :)   I didn't do this challenge to lose weight.  I wanted to see if I could actually stay on track for 2 weeks, and hopefully avoid those horrible binges.  That didn't happen, but it did help me get back in control faster, and I love that feeling!!

I wasn't happy with what the scale says.  I expected more, but with my binges a few days ago, and Chinese yesterday for Mothers Day, I can see why I didn't lose more.  I hate relying on scales.  Like I said, I gain weight so fast.  My clothes feel better, and I feel lighter if you that makes sense, so I am good!!!



So yeah, that's a 2 pound loss.  Like I said, not good for 2 weeks of watching.  Honestly,  I could weigh myself tomorrow and have lost 5 more pounds, so I hate relying on the scale, especially with  me not having my "time of the month" since February.  I guess I am in perimenopause, but that is for another post....Blah!  I have a few regrets from these past 2 weeks, but this is a work in progress and anything I do or don't do is going to get me to where I want to be.  A journey is full ups and downs and I will take them all! 

Thank you so much for putting up with me posting my food diaries every day, and thanks for being here with me to keep me accountable :)  I am off soon to a jewelry party at my sister's house that we are hosting.  I will get some fun pictures to share tomorrow :)  

xoxo

"Transformation is a process, 
and as life happens there are ups and downs.  
It's a journey of discovery."

~Rick Warren

Friday, May 8, 2015

Family, Kids and a Failure (Tracking Challenge Days 11 & 12)

Happy Friday!!

I was at a fire last night with the girls and I was too sleepy to post my day yesterday so you get 2 diaries again.....Lucky you!!  :)

Your Food Diary For:


Thursday, May 7, 2015 

My quick add for dinner was a home made pepperoni and cheese ball that my sister in law made.  I wasn't sure how to put that in so I just guessed :)

I had so much fun getting together with my sister and sister in laws.  We sat around the fire and just had girl talk.  They had wine, but I'm kinda of a light weight, so my sister got me some Arbor Mist which is like a wine and fruit juice combo.  It was yummy!!  I wish I would have taken my phone with me so I could post some fun pictures.  I only just recently got my smart phone, so I'm not used to bringing it with me.  I was always just a flip phone girl, and I never wanted a smart phone, but now that I have one, I just love it :)

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Today Dominic, our youngest moved back home for the summer.  I miss him when he's not here, but honestly, it's nice.  Just me and Greg here is nice, quiet and relaxing.  Does that sound like a bad mom??  Hmm....when my kids were little, other mom's used to say things like that, and I was appalled.  What a bad moms they are.  But now, now that it's me, I get it.  Not that I don't love my kids, but for them to move home and be here all the time again....ummm...i don't know :)  Greg and I have this nice little routine going on now.  Dominic will hardly ever be home, I'm sure, but he still is a boy and leaves a mess whatever room he is in.  It will be kinda nice to have some one to pick up after again, but I'm sure that little piece of nostalgia won't last, and I"ll be wishing he was back at school :)

Anyway, now for today's food......Oh boy..........


Your Food Diary For:


Friday, May 8, 2015 

I can't explain.  All I can say is that something came over me today.  That thing that happens when I'm doing great, getting cocky, thinking I can handle it.  That thing that starts small and ends huge.  As I look over my diary today, I notice that I messed up with breakfast.  If I would have had my protein instead of that yummy cereal and delicious creamers, maybe I would have been able to drive past McDonald's at lunch time instead of pulling in.  These past 2 weeks I have not been tempted at all with fast food.  The only thing I can think of is I didn't have a good breakfast and my blood sugar was screaming for more sugar.  I also notice that I didn't have any water today.  Diet Coke and Diet Dr. Pepper were my liquid of choice today.  Why?  I have no idea.  I don't know what goes through my mind on days like today.  I do feel that not drinking my water helped contribute to my dive bomb this entire day.  I was grocery shopping all day today.  Dominic was home and we chatted for a long time, and I put all my groceries away.  We ate our subs from Wegmans and it was then that I realized just how much damage I had done. I started putting this all in on myfitnesspal, and I couldn't believe it.  I was mindlessly eating all day.  I could just cry.  I knew what I was doing but I wasn't in control today.   All of that hard work will be ruined, I just know it.  My body gains weight just looking at food, trust me.  I have NO, I mean NO metabolism.  All of that junk will show on my scale.  I am sick.

Send me your strength to start again fresh tomorrow.....I'm going to need it.

xoxo

"Success is not final, failure is not fatal:  
it is the courage to continue that counts."

~Winston Churchill