Welcome to my little place!
My blog was started to help me come to terms with turning 50, to find myself as I become an empty nester, and to help me with my weight loss journey. (Update Here)
I am in an amazing place in my life so now follow me as I move forward with the good and the bad, my continued wieght loss journey and just my life!!


Monday, January 26, 2015

A Wonderful Monday Afternoon!!

Two of the many loves in my life are consignment shopping and coffee, so how excited was I that my sister asked if I wanted to go do both today!!??  Our first stop, of course, coffee.  This cute little local coffee house called the Brick House, is one of our favorite places to go.  In the summertime there is a huge wrap around porch with little bistro tables and chairs to sit at.  In the winter there is a beautiful fire place with cute little tables and comfy worn leather chairs to use.  This is where we sat today, in the comfy chairs :)  Oh it was heaven!  This is a picture of the Brick House at Christmas time. Wouldn't you stop here if you were driving by?? :)


After coffee, we continued our day with some consignment shopping.  I was in search of picture frames, or pictures that I could rip the frame off of.  Old or new, didn't matter what color, because I plan on painting them.  This is a picture that I found online that is my inspiration.  I am trying to find little projects to keep myself busy, for my own sanity in the winter and to keep me out of the kitchen eating :)  



Isn't this awesome looking??   Mine will not be down a hallway, but just on the wall in my living room.  Anyway, this is what I am aiming for.  I will be sure to show you pictures when I get it finished!!

When we were finished shopping we made a quick stop at  Starbucks for more coffee, because it was only 2:00 ya know :)  I had a yummy new coffee that my sister had heard about through a blog that she follows.  It was a Tall Skinny Cinnamon Dolce.  It was delicious and only 90 calories!  Having this hot delight may cause me to rethink starting my No Sugar diet again.  If I could only control myself, I could indulge in these fun things from time to time.  Sigh!!!  Oh the struggles we have!!  So, my Monday was perfect!  Perfect shopping companion, perfect coffee, and perfect purchases!!  I couldn't ask for more :) 

xoxo


"Crying is for plain women.  
Pretty women go shopping."

~Oscar Wilde

Friday, January 23, 2015

Poor Me!!!

I have Mondays and Fridays off during the week and Fridays are my grocery days.  I usually go to the gym first, but today started out with me in a "poor me" mood.  Since I've been off and on with my eating, I've been in these moods a lot lately.  So, what did I do to help myself??  I ate.  I over ate.  Then I didn't feel like getting dressed and going shopping, let alone the gym.  I hate days that begin like this one.  The feeling of failure.  The feeling of ugly.  The feeling of fat.  I was wallowing big time.  I decided to get up and at least clean the mess I made in the kitchen.  Once that was done, I started feeling a little better just by getting out of the chair.  I went out to the family room and was greeted with this adorable little sight..........


My little sweetie Mia.  How can you be in a bad mood when you look at her?  Well you can't.  She was so sweet, like she could sense my sad mood.  I took her out and snuggled with her.  I started thinking about how I was feeling, and I remembered a few months ago I ran into a girl I graduated with, whom I haven't seen for 30 plus years.  We were at a Jazzercise class and were talking about how we weren't as young as we were, our sizes had changed etc...and she said, well, you look exactly how you looked in high school.  You were always so happy and fun.  You were so pretty and still are.  Dang!!  If I could always see myself in some people's eyes I would never be in a "poor me" mood.  When I look in the mirror, I DO NOT see the girl I was in high school, but that is only because we are our own worst critic.  We pick apart our appearance as to what we want us to look like and be, not what others see.  I remember after she told me that I was high on life for days.  She's right!!  I am fun and happy!!  Why do I feel the need to let my failures dictate my mood.  I just need to take a step back and get remember this when I'm feeling fat, ugly, and just plain yucky about myself.  I'ts not always what's on the outside that people see.  It's the whole package :) 

xoxo


"Wanting to be someone else, is a waste of the person you are."

~Marilyn Monroe


Tuesday, January 20, 2015

Happy Anniversary!!

Today is my sister Connie's 20th wedding anniversary.  Her and my brother in law Paul are like the perfect couple.  They complement each other and have a love for each other that everyone strives to have in their life.

Here is Connie in our grooming salon today with her two dogs, Ellen and Greta.  The pillow is a gift from me :)




Connie is not only my sister, neighbor and business partner, but she is also one of my most best friends.  I am so blessed and lucky to have her in my life.  She gives me strength when I don't think I have it.  I wouldn't be who I am today if it wasn't for my sister :) Connie and Paul also gave me Paul, my wonderful nephew, who is one year younger than Dominic.  Paul and Dominic as just as lucky. They grew up together.  They are like brothers.  They were best friends when they were little and Connie and I used to wonder if they would still be as close when they were older.  Well....they are older now and they are still just as close.  They share a wonderful group of friends, who all spend a lot of time together and they spend the weekends at Dominic's school :)

Dominic and Paul............Before and After :) 

Dominic on the left and Paul on the right :) 



Paul on the left and Dominic on the right :)


So, happy anniversary to my beautiful Sister Connie and her husband Paul.  Thank you for setting a wonderful example of what love is and how to live a life together of patience, understanding, loyalty and just plain ole LOVE <3

xoxo


"The secret of a happy marriage is finding the right person.  
You know they are right if you love to be with them all of the time."

~ Julia Child

Monday, January 19, 2015

A Birthday Lunch!!!!

Today we celebrated my sister-in-law Julie's birthday.  Our family is pretty close.  I have a brother who is 13 months older than I, a sister who is 18 months younger, and then came our brother 12 years later :)  My parents have been together since they were in 9th grade, and just celebrated their 51st wedding anniversary :)  My brothers are both married...30 years of marriage, and 15 years and have 8 kids between them, my sister has been married 20 years and has one son which, along with my 3 totals 12 grand kids for my parents.  4 girls and the rest boys.  I give my parents the credit for all of our long lasting marriages. They have set a beautiful example for us all to follow.  Besides the fact that we all get along so well, we all live next door to each other too :)   Us girls in the family try to celebrate our birthdays together as much as possible.  Today we went to lunch and had a wonderful time.  My oldest niece was unable to be there because of babysitting issues. She is the mother of 3 boys under 8, but the rest of us came and took over the restaurant to celebrate Julie, and to celebrate just being together.

Here is the birthday girl with her daughter Alyssa and her pretty pink Cosmo drink :)




Here are the girls.....from the left...My Momma.....Steph (sil)...Connie (sister)...Me.....Blayne, my daughter....Alyssa....and Julie :)





I love spending time with my family.  They are all such a big part of who I am and I am blessed everyday to have them in my life <3


xoxo

"The more you praise and celebrate your life, 
the more there is in life to celebrate"

~Oprah Winfrey

Sunday, January 18, 2015

Letting Them Grow....

Wow, is it Sunday already??  This has been one busy week and it's gone by super fast.  My youngest moved back to college today after his long Christmas break.  This past week has consisted of work, shopping for supplies, shopping for fun food, and last minute lunch dates before he heads back.  It's not like he is moving far away,  it's only 30 minutes to his school, but being a boy, I take Mom/Son time when I can get it.  I try not to "bother" him while he's away from home.  I want him to do his own thing, and have his own space.  Let me tell you, that was hard initially.  When he left in August, it was so hard not texting or calling him to see how he was doing.   We are pretty close and I missed having him around.   He is the baby of the family and we always tended to baby him.   After some time,  it was easier to let him do his thing without having to know his every move.  It just took time.  He is loving college life.  He loves his classes and professors, and just was accepted into a fraternity.

This is Dominic.....doesn't he make an awesome looking college boy?? <3


It took awhile to get used to the long hair and beard, but hey....he's his own person and that's all part of letting them grow :) 

xoxo


"Parents can only give good advice or put them on the right paths,
but the final forming of a person's character lies in their own hands."

~Anne Frank


Sunday, January 11, 2015

Sundays and Letting Go

Sundays are one of my favorite days.  As I look out of my computer room window, my view is just beautiful.  The sun is almost down and the snow is amazingly stunning.


Sundays are my day to reflect on the past week, and to plan the week ahead.  Sundays are church days.  I love spending time in prayer, and centering myself.  I look forward to seeing and talking to my church family, and I also teach CCD ( it's the Catholic way of saying Bible School).  I have the second grade class and I look forward to spending time with them.  They take everything I say in, process it and question it.  I simply love it.  I've always been involved in my parish, but this year is the first year that I have taught a class.  This has been something that I've wanted to do for a long time and just never had the "time" to do it.  Really I just never felt like taking time away from the family to do it.   Dominic is no longer in CCD, as it only is for K-12, so I thought it would be the perfect time for me to dive in.  It so happened that the second grade teacher had decided that she no longer wanted to teach so I jumped at the chance.  Deciding to teach CCD was a big step for me in finding Lori.  It is something that I do and have that is just for me.  My family, my sister (who is my other half) has nothing to do with it. It's just Lori and it feels so good.  

Sundays have, in the past, also been the day I make my plans to start back on my diet that I blew Friday and Saturday.  Until Christmas and my big slip, I haven't had this problem....this weekend however, it was back to the old routine.  Monday was not a good day, as I told you.  I did however jump back on track the remainder of the week and did great....great until Friday and I was tempted with pizza and chocolate.  Oh boy.  I blew it the rest of the weekend.  I need a way to not do that.  I need to knock off that "all or nothing" mentality.  If anyone out there has any advice, I'd love you forever if you could share!! :)  As I was sitting in my computer room, which I also use as my prayer room, I was relaxing in my chair and praying.  I then remembered that all I need to receive help is to ask for it.  Let go and Let God.  Sometimes I forget that.  Sometimes you just have to be still and remember, be still and think and be still and listen   Being still in my own thoughts, in my own space is just another part of  finding Lori :) 

xoxo


"Don't spend your days trying to correct your mistakes.
Let Go and Let God  create something better for you,"

~Unknown

Monday, January 5, 2015

Deadly Pretty Vision :)

Good morning friends!!  Today was supposed to be the day that I jumped back on my diet again after my disastrous holiday eating.  I woke up determined to start fresh.  I got a cup of coffee, went up to my computer room and was face to face with this vision.....


Doesn't it look just too good not to eat??  I fought it for little bit, and then ate every piece, plus a few more left over holiday goodies.  Now you all know my secret......I have no willpower!!!  If it looks pretty, I'll eat it.  I have been working on losing weight all my life.  Well actually since my first pregnancy.  I never lost my baby weight and continued to gain throughout the years.  One thing on my "before 50" list is to lose weight.  I have been losing steadily for 2 months eating no sugar.  No added sugars and no natural sugars, which pretty much means that I have been eating meat, cheese, some veggies, eggs and...thats about it.  I've lost 30 pounds in 2 months doing this and have absolutely no cravings which I love!!  But you know, I don't really want to do this for life.  I decided to continue this until I reach a weight/size that I am happy with and then slowly start adding things back in my diet.  Ok...my starting weight 2 months ago was 230.  I am 200 right now  I was 195 on Christmas Eve, but jumped off my diet so I could eat all the things I haven't been eating for 2 months, and you know what??  It was fun, but 2 days later I felt horrible.  Tired, sluggish, lazy, my stomach was bloated and I felt like a failure.  Did I jump back on my diet??  Nope.  I've continued to eat junk until last night when I made the decision to get back on track.  Then this morning I was tempted, and I lost.  I have always been an all or nothing kind of girl.  Once I slip, I'm off for the whole day or the whole week, I need to change that so I keep telling myself that this slip doesn't need to continue the entire day.  We will see how it goes :)  I am not the girl that my husband married 29 years ago.  I am about 75 pounds heavier.  I don't want to get back down to 125.  I'd like to be around 160.  I think that would be a good fit for me.  My husband has seen me through it all and supports me and loves me at any weight, but I want to do this for him, Most of all, I want to do this for me, so I feel like the 19 year old that he married :)  

~xoxo

"Keep your goals closer than your temptation." 

~Unknown

Sunday, January 4, 2015

Hmm.....What's Next?

So, I'm not quite sure what to write next. I guess I will explain a little about my need for change before I turn the big 50.  You see, I met my hubby when I was 16.  We dated a few years, then got married a month before I turned 20.  We were together 2 years and then had our first baby, a girl we named Blayne.  She was followed 18 months later by her brother Connor.  When they were 6 and 8, their little brother Dominic came along.  These were wonderful years. I threw myself into being their mom.  I was fortunate enough that I was able to be a stay at home mom until Dominic turned 5 then I started my dog grooming business.  Anyways, long story I know.  The thing is, now there are gone.  Well Dominic is technically still home, but away at college and we are now empty nesters.  When he left for school in August, I realized....I don't know who I am anymore.  I really don't feel like "Mom", and I haven't been "Lori" in 27 years.  I think it was my mistake that I gave up my identity when I began having children.  I never built up friendships because I never worked outside the home to meet friends, and I was too "busy" with kids to take time out for me and fun adult stuff.  Now I am struggling to find me....To find my life without children.  I began this journey in August.  I have done a few things to kick it off, which I will tell you about in the next few weeks, but I feel like I have a long way to go.  I feel the need to change mentally, physically and just try to become more independent with my actions, words, and really, with my life.

~xoxo


"People make a lot of jokes about the empty nest. 
 Let me tell you, it is not laughing matter.  
It is really hard."

~Michelle Pfeiffer

Thursday, January 1, 2015

The Hope of Finding Lori!! (My Very First Post)

I wonder how many people will begin something new today.  With 2015 just beginning, I'm sure many will try to make changes in their lives.  I am just one of the many.  I've decided to start a blog.  Umm...did I just say that?   I've always outwardly disliked bloggers.  Who do they think they are, putting it all out there for everyone and anyone to see?  Why do they think anyone even cares?  Secretly I've been obsessed with them for a while now.  I care.  I love reading them.  I want that.  I want that feeling of putting something in writing and having being held accountable for it.  Even if no one ever reads my blog, I will never know so I will still feel like someone, somewhere is holding me accountable.  This is my 50th year.  Hmmm.....50.  I remember when that sounded really old.  I still feel like I am 30 so it really hasn't started to bother me yet.  I decided last year at 49 that I didn't want to be the same person a year from now, that I was at that time.  Does that make sense?  I will be 50 in July.  My world is changing, and I'm not even talking about my age when I say that.  This blog is going to be mine.  My thing that I can have all for myself and hold on to and know that I did it.  It is a blog about finding myself after 50 years.  It is designed to help me find who I am.  I've decided to use blogging as my first big change...as a hobby. (Because I don't have one and everyone says I need one).  My blog will hold all of my thoughts, feelings, daily fun stuff and the hope of finding Lori :)